with regard to my last entry, erm.. rasa macam tak smart la.. as in not Specific, Measurable, Achievable (not literally ok..), Realis.. stop la.. tak SM jer.. Anyways, my hubby will be having his exams starting minggu depan.. Kuat sungguh studynya! kesian pun ada, harap2 berjaya la, insyaAllah..

anyways, cuaca agak sejuk la. tadi ke pasar, masyaAllah, setengah jam je, tp tangan kami berdenyut2 sebab kesejukan. cik abang sampai bukak kasut dlm kereta in hope to panaskan ibu jari.. nasib baik afnan steady jer.. hairan pulak time2 winter nie, buah2an kt pasar tu murah2 je. e.g 10 biji apple/oranges for £1. strawberries 4 punnets for £1, pear la.. byk lagi. dan 2 minggu lepas dpt 1 tray apple (dekat 30 biji) for £1.. tp bila difikirkan balik byk2 sangat pun buat apa kan, membazir kalau tak boleh habis dlm 1 minggu.

i have also been surveying for places to go this summer. teringin nak ke amsterdam naik mini cruise tu tp quite costly la kalau nak g weekends, plus there's additional charges with the ferry if you want to stay an extra night (wpun bukan tido dlm ferry tu pun) nak kena book hotel lagi bla.. bla.. tengok la nanti how it goes. cik abang nak pusing2 uk je.. sebabnya tak habis pusing lg.. hehehhee.. itu la, kehendak hati banyak sangat tp onkos limited... nak balik msia lagi raya nie.. oh airasia sila la buat sale cepat! silap tak book hr tu, sangat teragak2.. tak pe, insyaAllah kalau ada rezeki dpt murah skit. kalau tak pun still airasia jgk sbbnya dah compare with a few other airlines and airasia plg murah. and i highlight this everytime; afnan will be paying full price ticket so.. i sound like a kedekut mom.. ngeh..ngeh.. apa2 je la kan..

well, when it comes to my daughter, i do try to get her whatever her heart desires. that includes a push car. she has one back in malaysia, and she still likes it. once in Asda she stopped at the toys alley and cried 'mama, mama!' when she sees a push car. something that i could never ever forget. the brand new - no brand push car was steep (in my opinion) so i did not buy, which breaks my heart everytime i thought of her.. nak buat macamana.. so the only time that she would have any access to a push car is when we go over to k fatma's house and she plays with k fatma's kids (who happen to have a push car). anyways, just recently we bought a push car, finally (yeay!) and guess what? she would say 'hilman' everytime she's around her pushcar!!! hilman as in k fatma's son!!! i am sooooo sedihh... haruuuu sangat2.. nasib baik beli jugak pushcar tu...

lesson learnt? i felt like a lousy mom.. i always do.. what could i do? and i always, always feel guilty? kenapa??